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Looking back…

I was a pre-teen girl in the 90’s before the internet was common in households. We had to hang out with our friends IN REAL LIFE every time we needed connection and conversation. Unless I wanted to use the “house phone” and risk possible eavesdroppers, I was often alone with my own complicated thoughts and had a serious lack of skills in processing my world.

There was nothing inherently wrong with this setup, and many would argue kids were better off without all the tech and connectivity they have today. The point is that myself and many young girls needed a way to express what was in our minds and mentally metabolize our lives. My world at the time was especially confusing and disjointed.

What I WAS able to access in the midst of chaos and use to my great benefit was writing.

With encouragement from some strong and stable adults in my life, I started writing. Sometimes in a journal: narrative, poetry, rage ramblings, etc.

Sometimes in middle school English class, when we were tasked with writing our autobiography. (That teacher should have been double paid for education as well as therapy.)

I would write letters to my mom, who I was separated from; letters I never intended to send but just needed to write.

Like all of us, the older I got, the busier I got.

High school and college workloads, employment, relationships, marriage, children. Quickly the rest of “life” snuffed out my urge to write for my own benefit. Also during my young adulthood, cell phones became the norm and I easily pivoted to using technology as a means to communicate, relate, process, distract, and fill my mind.

Here and Now..

After turning 40, my mind started to feel overfull, chaotic, and foggy.

My three boys are older and more independent, so it wasn’t the familiar sleeplessness or exhaustion that comes with caring for humans who needs you for every single thing.

It also wasn’t the textbook mental health symptoms I’ve come to recognize as depression, anxiety, or an extra fun mix of the two, all of which I’ve experienced. This was a new feeling of overwhelm, a lack of mental clarity, and a general fatigue of the BRAIN.

Now, I know that I am in the typical age group for perimenopause, and I know this is the hottest health topic among us middle-aged women. I talk and joke about it all the time, and make many health decisions based on this factor.

But after considering all my current life challenges, character weaknesses, and changes I wanted to make in this new season —I decided to give writing a try again.

And it is CHANGING THE GAME FOR ME.

AND IT CAN CHANGE THE GAME FOR YOU TOO.

For the last two years I have been supporting my own sanctification, growth, and mental health with a personal writing practice. (PWP). Journaling isn’t the exact right word here because it creates mental picture of narrative-style writing. (Dear Diary…)

While it IS that sometimes, it is often so different.

I write lists.

I write the thoughts I catch myself thinking when the subconscious takes over and my mind wanders.

I write goals, 5-year plans, and letters to other people.

I write new and interesting ideas I have at random times.

I draw (ugly) pictures and timelines and graphs.

The point here is that it’s whatever I PERSONALLY need to write, and it happens on a rather consistent basis, making it a PRACTICE. Personal Writing Practice.

Because of this new habit, I am clearing much of the brain fog and overwhelm.

My racing thoughts are slower. My destructive mindsets are more quickly noticed and reframed. I can see my role in my own suffering.

I can track God’s goodness and provision in my life more closely and specifically, breeding increased gratitude and trust.

I can mine out the source of my emotions when it’s not clear. I can align my goals and desires and connect them to a deep set of values I want to maintain.

Though it’s been slow, my ability to focus on a single task over time is improving.

This year I have been working on a sort of framework for mental fitness, called The Anchored Framework, that is housed and explained here on my website under the RESOURCES tab.

Essentially, it includes 4 pillars that build a stronger mind: Awareness, Reflection, Reframing, and Action. It’s all a work in progress, but I decided to invite people along for the ride.

In my Substack newsletter, I plan to share prompts, thought experiments, and methods that help women build and grow a personal writing practice. I believe in the power of writing to shape the mind, and thus shape a person’s reality. What you think determines much of your lived experience. Change your thinking = Change your life.

I’ll share writing prompts, thought experiments, stories, inspiration, and links to content that support a clear, strong, free mind.

It’s fine if writing feels foreign and weird and uncomfortable to you.

We aren’t authoring a book here. The writing isn’t even the result; it’s the mind changes we’re after. No one every has to see what you write, and it doesn’t have to be “good” by any standard. It just has to get your thoughts out of your head where you can see and evaluate them.

You do not have to outsource your thinking to the media or the people around you, or quit it all together because it’s too much.

You can think for yourself; carefully, critically, deeply, and with great success.

Emails should come out on Sunday evenings beginning Nov 30th. They will be brief, and hopefully helpful to you as the week begins and you set your mind for the days ahead. I would love for you to join me on this journey!

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